penis war(Or "Dick Size War", "DSW") Any argument which has degenerated into quantitative boasting of the sort "My [program|bot|etc.] is [faster|meaner|etc.] than yours!", generally as unconstructive (and with as little emphasis on empirical proof) as men debating who has the biggest penis. The term is often used on {IRC}, {news:alt.sysadmin.recovery}, and sometimes applied to IRC {botwars}, because of their equally pointless nature. (1999-07-14)